Emma (Canada)
Emma (Canada): I often feel anxious when talking to new people or speaking in groups. I worry about saying something wrong or embarrassing myself. Because of this, I avoid social situations, but I don’t want to feel this way forever. How can I become more comfortable and confident in social settings?
Askly Help: Emma, social anxiety is something many people experience, but the good news is that you can overcome it with practice and the right mindset. Here’s how you can build confidence in social situations:
-
Take Small Steps – Start with small interactions, like greeting a cashier or making a short comment in a conversation. Gradually push yourself toward bigger social situations.
-
Prepare but Don’t Overthink – If you know you’ll be in a social setting, think of a few topics you feel comfortable talking about. But don’t over-plan—natural conversations flow better.
-
Shift Focus Away from Yourself – Instead of worrying about how you sound, focus on the other person. Listen actively and ask questions. Most people appreciate a good listener.
-
Challenge Negative Thoughts – If you think, “I will say something embarrassing,” ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can happen?” The truth is, most people won’t remember small mistakes.
-
Practice Speaking in Front of a Mirror or With Friends – Practicing in a comfortable setting will make real conversations feel easier.
-
Control Your Breathing – Anxiety often makes us breathe too quickly. If you start feeling nervous, take slow, deep breaths to calm yourself.
-
Be Kind to Yourself – No one is perfect in conversations. Even if you stumble on words or feel awkward, it’s okay. The more you practice, the easier it will become.
-
Put Yourself in More Social Situations – Avoiding social settings makes anxiety worse. The more you expose yourself to conversations, the more natural and comfortable it will feel over time.
Emma, confidence in social situations grows with time and effort. You don’t have to be perfect—you just have to be present and willing to try. Would you like help in practicing conversation techniques?