"My family and society expect something different from what I love to do. What should I do?"
Problem:
"My family and society expect something different from what I love to do. What should I do?"
Your own dreams versus your family's expectations: Where is the solution?
Sender: Rajesh Malhotra | Software Engineer | Mumbai, India
I'm getting lost in this confusion between what I want and what others want.
Rajesh Malhotra is a software engineer from Mumbai. His true love since childhood was writing, but due to family pressure, he pursued a career in the IT sector. Now he has a good income and job security, but a void remains in his heart.
When he talks about making a career out of writing, family and friends say, "There's no future in this," "It's better to stick to a hobby," or "Will this make a good income?"
Rajesh is in a dilemma - should he pursue his dreams, or stay in a safe career after listening to his family?
This problem is not unique to Rajesh, thousands of people go through the same dilemma. On one hand, we feel the pull of our dreams, and on the other hand, we want to live up to the expectations of our family.
How to balance family expectations vs. your own dreams?
1. Understand why the family wants this
Families love us and want us to be safe. So they usually want to steer us towards conventional and safe careers.
✅ Suggestions:
- Try to understand the family's perspective.
- It's natural for them to be worried—don't blame them.
2. Clarify your goals
It's not enough to just dream, you also need to know how to turn it into reality.
✅ Suggestions:
- Understand what you really want.
- Make a realistic plan for how your dream can come true.
3. Proceed step by step.
Family or societal barriers won't disappear overnight. So prove yourself slowly.
✅ Suggestions:
- If possible, do something you love in addition to your current job.
- Gradually transform your dreams into income and stability.
- Once successful, the family will also understand that it is feasible.
4. Talk openly with your family.
Many times we don't tell anyone about our troubles, which leads to misunderstandings.
✅ Suggestions:
- Calmly state your wishes.
- Give importance to and respond to their fears and concerns.
5. You are the owner of life.
Family and society are important, but at the end of the day, your life is yours. Even if you can't meet your family's expectations at some point, they will want you to be happy.
✅ Suggestions:
- Respect your own life.
- If your dream truly makes you happy, then give it importance.
Last words
Rajesh, making decisions in life is not easy, especially when you have to balance the love of your family with your dreams. But remember, you are the only one who knows which path will bring you true satisfaction.
Have you ever had such an experience? Share your feelings!