Problem: Relationship distance and emotional loneliness
Problem: Relationship distance and emotional loneliness
Name: Emily Thompson
Occupation: Teacher
Location: London, United Kingdom
I'm Emily, a 37-year-old teacher. I've always been a social person, but now I feel like a warmth is missing from my life.
My husband and I have been together for almost a decade. We still love each other, but we seem to be drifting apart. Our conversations have become limited, our time together has become routine, and that deep connection is slowly fading.
Not only with my husband, but also with my friends, my relationship is not the same as before. Everyone is busy, some are busy with their families, some are busy with their jobs, and I feel that I am becoming lonely. Looking at the pictures on social media, it seems that everyone is fine, everyone is busy, only I am lonely.
How can I overcome this loneliness? How can I warm up relationships again?
— Emily Thompson, London
Solution: Askly Help's sincere advice
Dear Emily,
Your feelings are very real and many people go through this problem, but many do not want to admit it. Loneliness is a feeling that hits us deep inside, and slowly reduces our self-confidence. But there is good news - it is possible to overcome it, if you take some conscious steps.
1. Distance in Relationships: Rekindling Love
Being together for a long time brings a natural cooling to many relationships, but love is not completely lost. It just needs to be brought back to its warmth.
- Pay attention to the little things: Have you ever wondered when was the last time your husband truly complimented you, or when was the last time you two spent a special moment together? Pay attention to the little things to bring back the warmth in your relationship—sitting together and talking, giving him a small gift out of the blue, cooking him something he likes.
- Do something together: Sharing new experiences can bring your relationship closer. Maybe take a class together, go out to eat once a week, or go on a trip together.
- Speak your mind: Many times we feel distance but don't express it. Speak openly with your husband, but not in a complaining tone, but in the language of love.
2. Friendship Distance: Reestablishing Connection
You said that all your friends are busy, and you are feeling lonely. This is very normal, because with age, everyone's responsibilities increase, and communication decreases. But this does not mean that old connections are lost.
- Take the initiative: Sometimes we think, "They don't reach out to me, so why should I?" But to maintain a relationship, we have to take the first step. Send a message, call, maybe even suggest a quick meeting.
- Make new connections: Life never stops, and even if you're separated from old friends, it's still possible to make new connections. Maybe through your professional life, a club, or a social venture, make new friends.
- Spend less time on social media: Everyone shares their best moments on social media, which makes it seem like they are always happy. But the reality is different. So increase real connections, don't rely on virtual connections.
3. Taking care of yourself to eliminate loneliness
If you are good to yourself, your relationships will gradually improve.
- Love yourself: Do something for yourself—start a new hobby, exercise, or set aside some time for yourself every day.
- Write down your feelings: Sometimes what we feel gets bottled up if we don't express it. You can keep a diary where you can write down your feelings every day.
- Help others: Try to help the people around you—it gives you peace of mind and reduces loneliness.
Last words
Emily, you are not alone. Life is an ongoing process, and relationships will not always be the same. If you consciously try, you can bridge this gap and make your relationships better.
Take your time, move slowly, and remember—your feelings matter, and you deserve love and connection.
Best wishes,
— Askly Help